I Moved Across the Continent for a Job. Everything Changed When I Arrived

I was born and raised in Edmonton, Alberta, a place known for its harsh winters and a really big mall. Some of my fondest memories are of snow days when school was canceled due to the extreme cold so I could stay home and goof around with my brothers.

We were quite a crew, my brothers and I. We’re two sets of Irish twins, a term used when siblings are born within a year of each other. That means my mother had four boys in five years! No wonder we turned into such a lively bunch of hellions. Who could possibly control that many rambunctious kids? This is the DNA of my childhood.

Growing up with three brothers was a rowdy adventure, especially during holidays and special occasions. Since my parents split up when I was six, I would often bounce between households. This could be stressful, and it brought an element of chaos that was somehow connected to the idea of a family holiday.

Despite the chaos and tension, there was comfort in the rituals and routines. For instance, every Christmas Day, we would wake up at Dad’s house, have breakfast, and open presents. Around noon, we would be dropped off at Mom’s house for more presents and dinner.

Being born on Christmas Eve is a whole other reason that I have a unique perspective on holidays. As a child, I felt a sense of unfairness. It seemed like I was only getting one present for both my birthday and Christmas. But as I grew older, my perspective shifted. I began to see myself as the luckiest guy because I would always get to see my family on my birthday. The guarantee of never being alone on my special day was comforting.

As I continued to age, my feelings evolved yet again. I realized that having to see my family for every single birthday is a hellish burden from which I’ll never be free. It’s funny how our perceptions can change over time. But in the end, it’s all part of life’s rich tapestry.

At the age of 15, I discovered improvisation and found joy in making people laugh. The unpredictability and spontaneity of it appealed to me, and it became a turning point in my life. I shifted my focus from making kids laugh in the classroom to performance and making people laugh from the stage. I loved it and I never looked back.

My journey into the film industry was not direct. I started out as an improviser at Rapid Fire Theatre, a theater in my hometown of Edmonton. Eventually I became the artistic director there, and then in January 2010, I moved to Atlanta to run a theater company called Dad’s Garage.

Shortly after my arrival, we lost the building where the theater had originated. For many companies, this would have been a death blow, but we were fortunate to have a team of passionate and talented individuals who were determined to overcome this setback.

We found ourselves in a scramble, sharing space with another theater while we figured out our next steps. It was a familiar chaos for me to have moved across the continent for a job, only to find everything changing the moment I arrived. Luckily if my childhood prepared me for one thing, it was this kind of unpredictability.

Still I couldn’t help but feel like I was spinning my wheels, wasting my efforts on the impossible task of saving a struggling theater company so far from my home. Just like Michelle, the main character in my film, I felt like I had risked it all only to come up short.

We raised funds, purchased a nearby church in 2013, renovated it, and launched the company in this new space. This marked the beginning of an unprecedented golden age for Dad’s Garage.

The journey was not easy. We went through the fire, but we emerged stronger. We now owned a building that couldn’t be taken away by a landlord. We even had a parking lot, an unglamorous but crucial detail for venue operators.

Reflecting on my time running that organization, it was hard, sweaty, grimy, and grindy. But I’m also incredibly proud of what we accomplished. Dad’s Garage has become, more than ever, a pillar of the arts community in Atlanta. Despite the fragile nature of the non-profit arts industry, we persevered and thrived, and I am grateful for the experience.

My journey into indie film was a natural progression from my long-standing creative relationship with my friend Arlen Konopaki. We’ve been a comedy and improv duo called Scratch since 2005. Arlen, who is passionate about film and holds an MFA in film direction from NYU, and I, with my passion for writing, found this to be a natural extension of our duo.

In 2018 I came up with the idea to write a comedy/drama inspired by my family dynamics. The script wasn’t initially supposed to be turned into a Christmas movie. But my wife Amber suggested making it one, given my love for the holiday. Once we decided to do that, it unlocked a lot of fun for me. It just seemed to fit naturally. Everything just snowballed from there, I decided to call it How to Ruin the Holidays.

Seeing my script come to life was a special experience, particularly because I got to share it with my real family. They were involved in many ways, not just through the characters portrayed in the script. For example, they were very supportive of me raising the budget for the movie, which we made for $300,000. A bunch of my family members even flew down from Canada to Atlanta, rented an Airbnb, and catered the whole production. They cooked all the time and would come to set just to drop off meals for the cast and crew.

When I got to share the completed film with them through screenings, it was really meaningful to me. I have a big Irish Catholic family, with an equally numerous Chinese side to the family tree, and it was amazing to see them all there, supporting me and the project. It was a crazy, wonderful experience that I will always cherish.

In the script, I resonate deeply with the lead character, Michelle, because in many ways her story mirrors my own life journey. Like Michelle, I moved away from my family, from Canada to Atlanta, and only returned for holidays. This experience of distance and change, coupled with a sense of guilt for being away while chasing my dreams, is a central theme in the script.

As much as I hate to admit it, I also relate with the character Andrea. She writes a brilliant script, but nobody cares to read it, and everyone thinks she’s a joke. As an artist, I sometimes feel the same way. No matter what you do, there’s always a sense that you’re not quite legit, that you’ll never be a real comedian or writer or filmmaker in the eyes of the people around you.

One of the most rewarding aspects of this project was working with so many friends that I’d made over the years. On screen you can see my wife Amber Nash play the lead, my friend Luke play the brother, and one of my favorite people in the whole world, Colin Mochrie, plays the dad. Behind the scenes it was my long time improv collaborator Arlen directing, and I had my Dad’s Garage colleagues Lara Smith, Megan Dahl, and Jon Carr producing. They all contributed to the film in meaningful ways and all their contributions reflect how this project is a full circle moment for me, closing the loop between my family life back in Canada and my new life as a comedy writer and producer in Atlanta.

Edmonton native Kevin Gillese is an accomplished writer, producer, and improviser. His new film How to Ruin the Holidays starring Amber Nash, Colin Mochrie, Aisha Tyler, and Luke Davis is available now on Amazon.

All views expressed in this article are the author’s own.

As told to Newsweek’s associate editor Carine Harb.

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