In a TikTok video that has garnered more than 10,000 likes, Nicole Vette, seasoned divorce lawyer and founder of VetteLaw, shared advice on what not to do when a marriage is heading toward divorce.
In her guidance, Vette outlined seven specific actions to avoid for those who suspect their union might end in divorce court.
Firstly, the divorce lawyer warns against prolonging a troubled marriage to a partner who is accumulating substantial student loan debt, saying that they’re considered marital debts and subject to equal division in a divorce, regardless of who benefited from the education. That advice is particularly relevant, given the Federal Reserve Bank of St. Louis’ finding that 46 percent of young married couples had student loan debt in 2016, triple the share of couples that had student loans in 1989.
Secondly, Vette advised against accruing significant credit card debt solely in one’s name, as it can lead to personal financial liability, despite any agreements made during divorce proceedings.
She further stressed the importance of keeping pre-marital assets, gifts and inheritances separate from marital funds, saying that mixing them can complicate the financial separation process and may lead to an undesired division of what was originally personal property.
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Loans from family members are also scrutinized during divorce, she said, often being viewed as gifts rather than legitimate debts, which can result in the family not being reimbursed fully. If a loan must be taken, Vette suggests formalizing it with a promissory note signed by both parties.
The lawyer also advised against moving out of the marital home during separation, unless necessary for safety reasons. Vette said that for married couples with children, moving out could inadvertently establish a child support claim and affect the equitable distribution of the home itself.
Regarding personal and expensive valuables like jewelry, Vette said to make sure that each piece is insured, as they often become points of contention, with claims of loss or misplacement arising during bitter divorces.
Lastly, the lawyer advised against keeping large cash amounts in safes accessible to both parties, as it can lead to disputes over missing funds. Instead, she recommends keeping money in accounts to create a clear paper trail.
While Newsweek has reached out to Vette via email for comment, insights from SmartAsset, a fintech company that offers financial advice, offer a more nuanced view in understanding asset division in divorce. Newsweek also reached out to SmartAsset for comment.
According to SmartAsset’s website, marital property, including primary residences, vehicles and retirement accounts, is typically subject to division. Separate property, owned prior to the marriage or received as gifts or inheritances, may be treated differently.
In community-property states like California, Nevada and Texas, marital assets are divided equally, while equitable-distribution states focus on fair, but not necessarily equal, division. SmartAsset recommends taking proactive steps like establishing prenuptial agreements or setting up irrevocable trusts, which can help protect assets.
For those currently navigating turbulent waters in the absence of a prenup, SmartAsset says on its website, actions like inventorying assets and opening separate bank accounts become critical. It’s also advised to consider liabilities, close joint credit card accounts and maintain an emergency fund post-divorce.
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Uncommon Knowledge
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.
Newsweek is committed to challenging conventional wisdom and finding connections in the search for common ground.